Monday, January 4, 2010

Day Seventy-Eight...Sometimes I Have To Listen


I had an experience the other day day that I would like to share. It's something that sounds like "What's the big deal"..but to me it was a revelation.

I went for a trail run with my running pal, Pamela. We have been doing one trail run a week and I really have enjoyed the difference to running on the road. We are on target for our training for our 1/2 marathon in March, so we were doing a 6 mile run. Piece of cake. We started off and all was well. We were talking and catching up on our New Years Eve evenings and the updates on our kids. We passed our 2 mile marker and were going to run another mile out and then head back to our starting point. The trail was starting to get hilly and I was starting to get dizzy. "Push yourself Wolffie, you can do it". So I listened to my inner radio station called KF*CK. As the course was getting hillier I was getting dizzier. I yelled out to Pamela, "I gotta walk for a bit". I was not happy. I couldn't believe I had to stop running. My mouth was parched and I remembered that all the soda I had been drinking all week and the fact that I did not drink a lot of water before the run was taking its toll. If you don't treat your body like a temple then you are screwed. I proceeded to run again as we had turned around and we were running down hill. I GOT A MAJOR CRAMP. "Breathe through it Wolffie" So I tried. It wasn't going away. My inner voice became soft and loving "Walk Wolffie, just walk". I listened to that voice as my head and right hand were both tingling. I wasn't ready to faint on the trail. "Go on ahead Pamela, I am walking the rest of the way". She ran ahead and turned back to loop me to make sure I was okay. What a great partner!!!! When the end of the run was in sight I told her to go on ahead as I was better. The tingling had stopped. Usually when I am running on the trail, I am looking down on the path so I won't trip on a rock or branch. Now that I was walking, I was able to notice the varying shades of greens and oranges of the leaves, the shadows on the mountains and the structures along the trail. It was beautiful. It was magical. I felt so lucky to be in the moment noticing my surroundings and not being angry with myself for having to walk. There are good running days and bad running days..but it's kind of like lemons and's all in what you make it.

My healthy..drink water and be kind to your body. My body is sacred and I have to listen to it, honor it and treat it with respect.

Why Listen to Wolffie? Because I get it. I love my kids..I really do. I can't wait for vacation time. We can sleep in, see movies and not have to take them to their practices. It's chill time at our house. The first week of vacation was great. Our daughter came home from Boulder and were were all together once again. Then the, "What are we going to do today" starts kicking in. Where are we having lunch? Can we get our nails done? Can I wear your shirt? I don't want to see that movie. Can so and so sleep over? Can you take me here. Can you take me there? What am I? A bank? A bus stop? A chauffeur? (well that I know I'm that!!) All of a sudden my need for them to go back to school is STRONG. I feel guilty for feeling this way. I have come to realize that as good as the structure of the school year is for my is just as good for me. I don't work well with idle time for days in a row. It doesn't mean that I don't like to hang with my kids..I do...I really do..I seem to get a brain fart around holiday and summer and don't make some plans for them and myself ahead of time. Needless to say as my internal alarm clock sounded off this morning and I was getting the boys off to school.... I WAS IN HOG HEAVEN!!
Sh*t. I gotta go get the boys to do their homework. Did I say I liked the school schedule?!?!?!?!

Can you relate? More will be revealed. Please come back for more.

Signing off until we meet again.

In Love and Peace,


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