Monday, January 25, 2010

Day Eighty-Four...Do You Have To Be So Insensitive?

As I sit here waiting for the hubby to come out of his colonoscopy, I can’t help but be pissed. I don’t even know where to start. There is muzac playing in the waiting area. I feel like I am in an elevator. They handed the hubby a buzzer to hold until his name is called. I feel like I am in a restaurant. So impersonal. Where has the warm and fuzzy human contact gone? We both walk up to a dude after the buzzer rang. He was taking the hubby into the surgery area. I am a couple of steps behind when I hear the dude ask (very rudely), “Is someone staying with you or picking you up?” I tried to ask him a question and the dude was being really persistent… “Is someone staying with you or picking you up?” Does the dude have any sense that the hubby is nervous and so am I? Routine colonoscopy or not, we are entitled to be nervous. Right?!? All I wanted to ask…and I finally did…”Are you going to call me when he’s awake’? His answer..”Are you staying or coming back to pick him up? "I'd like to sit with him when he wakes up”. Nasty dude, open your ears. I stare at him. I mean glare at him “YOU CAN'T COME IN” he says. “WHY NOT?”, I bark. HIP(the privacy Act)…Fu*K you… I thought to myself. I could see the hubby getting irritated. I shut up and kissed him good-bye. ..I went back to write this. I am fuming on the inside. I threw down (gently) my laptop and went to the front desk and spoke with a nice lady. Of course the nasty dude was wrong. I can sit with the hubby. And I will. If there is one thing I have learned in my years of dealing with doctors and hospitals…you have to be an advocate for yourself and your family and you MUST speak up. I don’t understand why some people who work in the health care field have to be cranky. Of course there are nice and lovely caring people who work in hospitals and doctors offices. but the ones who are cranky..make me have a bad taste in my mouth. In the end though, I was nice, persistent and I got to be with the hubby. I don’t want to miss out on how funny he is when he wakes up from anesthesia!! That could a blog entry in itself! (he is fine and healthy!!!)

Why listen to Wolffie? Because I get it. I had a doctor’s appointment right after the hubby this morning for my knee. The long and short of my visit today is..I have to have an MRI. To some of you, this might sound like a no biggie event. To me, I have one word to describe my initial reaction. Panic!! I have a issue with MRI’s. I have Claustrophobic Syndrome. I made them (in a nice panicky way) call and make sure that my head would be out of the machine. It is going to be. I haven’t gotten to the bottom as to why I am claustrophobic. I have made my blood pressure rise many times. I really don’t like elevators, especially the ones that don’t show you what floor you are on. My heart starts racing and I get light headed. It’s crazy..but I can’t help it. I try to breathe in and get into a calm meditative state. I don’t totally get into a calm place but it is better than hysteria!!! Some will say I have control issues. Is it so wrong to know what floor you are passing as you go up or down on an elevator? Also, why does it sometimes take so long for the doors to open? On time I asked the maintenance man at a huge office building to ride in the elevator with me. He thought I was nuts. Okay maybe I was a little, but I can’t imagine being stuck in an elevator alone. I know I sound like a weirdo head case, but I give myself a pat on the back for getting in elevators. Sometimes I cave into the fear and take the stairs. I won’t walk up 17 flights of stairs. I draw the line at walking up 8 flights of stairs. The positive is that it does burn calories, clears your mind and gets your heart pumping. Maybe I should start a new fad diet!?! Hmmmmmm. What should I name it? The Honor That You Have Claustrophobia Diet. I see a big book deal in the works for this one!!!

Can you relate? More will be revealed. Please come back for more.

Signing off until we meet again.

In Love and Peace,



  1. oh no what a crummy experience!! im so glad that it ended well- heres even more inspiration to become a doc and to work on a happy attitude every day... lots of love :-) M

  2. Oh how I love growing older and better with you.....caught up this morning on my Wolffie's Words and you know how I am smiling. So glad Steve o is healthy and fine. xoxo

  3. susansidel@gmail.comJanuary 26, 2010 at 9:54 AM

    Ooooh as a "professional"sick person, the stories I could tell... You did what you you have to do in a most sane found the light. On the MRI front, what helps me is a rear view mirror they attach so that my view is the expansive space behind me and not the cavernous MRI tunnel in front! Much love xoxox