Tuesday, February 2, 2010

Day Eighty-Eight..How Many Times Do I Have To Tell You?!?


I met my friend's sister today who was visiting from Massachusetts.. I mentioned somewhere casually in the conversation that I blog. She asked what I blog about and I fumbled a bit: "Well....I...talk about mom stuff...getting older and women stuff". As the words were rolling out of my mouth, I felt a bit like a egotistical person. Now really Wolffie does my banter really matter in the big scheme of things? I know my thoughts and opinions will not save the world...but in some small way..it saves my world. It's a time in the day when I forget about my mommy and wifely obligations. I can spew whatever I want and it gives me a sense of purpose and much more than that it brings humor to my ever so crazy and fun filled life. If I were to be a bit more honest, it feels gratifying when people relate and laugh at my antics. Who doesn't enjoy validation from time to time? So, here goes one for the record. I have asked my boys.... let me see....... one trillion times NOT to kick the soccer ball near my car. It is less than a year old and I really don't want dents from the damn ball. Is that asking too much? Obviously my boys think it is..because as I write this there are 2 soccer ball prints on my rear view mirror. How did it get there? Amnesia has taken over. It just got there and no one knows how it happened!! Today as I was walking into the house, one of my Soccer Studs kicked the ball nice and hard and it hit the passenger side of my car. I wasn't happy. I went into my long and boring speech that I know my kids immediately tune me out to: "How many times do I have to ask you not to blah blah blah. I am sure you know the rest because if you are a parent, I am sure you have given the speech and if your are not a parent, I am sure sometime in your childhood you were the not so lucky recipient of the speech. Where did that speech get me? NO WHERE. All I got was an "I'm sooooorrrrrry". "Are you really? I think not because you keep on doing it". "I'm sooooorrryyy. It was an aaaaaacident". Do I need to go on with this I am sick of this happening tale? I vowed when I became a mom that I would not have waw waw waw waw waw lectures with my kids. How did I get here then? I am a waw waw waw mom. I think it is a rite of passage for my kids and for me. The roles we play are apart of being a: I am going to do what I want and conveniently forget everything my mom tells me kid AND a: please respect and listen to me mom. Heavy sigh. It's maddening sometimes...but I love my brood. I love that they have their own opinions. I just would like to feel like I am heard sometimes. Helloooooo in there..come out into our world for a bit.

Why Listen to Wolffie? Because I get it. Isn't life about yin and yang? That same Soccer Stud who hit my car today did a wonderful touching thing yesterday. When My daddy died, it was not expected. We were all in shock. I still can be in disbelief and it has been three years since he has died. Back to the touching moment...my mom bought a new car yesterday. I was having a conversation on my blue tooth so when my mom voiced that it was a hard day for her..my 13 year old boy looked at me with such compassion and love and whispered "Is it because Papa bought her the car? I shrugged my shoulders and when I could...I asked my mom why it was a hard day. She said exactly what Soccer Stud had whispered to me. I can't even imagine the loss she feels. I can't even imagine what it feels like to sell a car that was given to you from your spouse who no longer can give you gifts. I know what it feels like to lose a parent. It hurts like hell but I have a hubby and children to lesson the pain. So, when by boy understood immediately what his Nana was feeling..I felt proud. Maybe those long blah blah blah lectures were heard through the waw waw waw's.

Can You relate?

More will be revealed. Please come back for more.

Signing off until we meet again.

In Love and Peace,


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